Discipline

I am still working on what works best for me when it comes to disciplining my children. I have tried many different approaches and I have yet to find one that works like a charm because I don't think one magic charm exists. It is equally difficult to find one that meshes well with my personality. I realize that different approaches are needed to fit different situations as well as different children. As the child grows so does the need and the spectrum of the discipline, however consistency does seem to be the key.

My son Cole continues to baffle me when it comes to figuring out his "currency". We have tried stickers. We have tried a good behavior jar. We have tried time outs. We have tried grounding. He is a strong willed child to say the least, and he knows how to push my buttons. My friend Chenoa and I laugh about our eldest children whom are very much alike. It is so nice to have a friend I can honestly speak with about my feelings regarding how difficult I have found it to be parenting a child that is very much like myself. She doesn't judge, she doesn't pity, and she truly doesn't compare her successes/failures with mine. She has her own which she shares with me just as openly. And neither of us has to explain to the other that regardless of all the difficulties, we love our children more than life itself. Part of our biggest problem is wrapped up in the desire to be the best for our children. Anyway, thank you my friend for being part of the architectual planning commitee in helping to shape and build the wondrous and complicated 'cathedral' that is Cole.

So today's discipline conundrum came about at church. Well sort of...Today I was in charge of the church's nursery. Just me...no one else. This is because I can't say no, and because I am a huge SUCKER. The regular, and trained professional, was away on a religious ed. weekend with the teenagers that also sometimes help out in the nursery. I had no back up. Trey is on call, so I was flying solo...again. I cannot begin to accurately describe my anxiety this morning. So, my back up was Cole. He promised to help me out and provide a good example to the younger children. Well...

All things considered, the morning was a success, but Cole disappointed me. He was just completely single minded about not listening at the expense of his own desire to run like a rooster without a head through the nursery leading the rest of the crazy boys (of which there were 6) like the Pied Piper. He had a blast, but he knows better. I want him to have fun and be a kid, but he needs to listen. No running inside. The end. Just him and Jack running in a confined space together sets my heart racing. They are not the most coordinated of children, and both seem to have feet the size of flippers that account for frequent falls and trips. Jack alone looks like scarface because of a recent run in with a tree at the park. Trees don't even run.

Cole is currently in his room writing 20 times: I will listen to my Mom.
I figure today was a good day to try the nuns' approach to discipline. It is my new blend of discipline and time management: work on a meaningful punishment while improving penmanship. Maybe this tactic will stick around for awhile...at least until I am dealt a new hand of cards.

It takes 3 hours and 22 minutes for a 5 year old to self directedly write out a simple sentence 20 times at the end of which they may look like this: